Don't overcomplicate dating! Understanding this important concept about the reds, greens, and yellow flags are all the dating rules are all you need.

The Only Three Dating Rules You Need: Know Your Reds, Greens, and Yellows.

In Podcast by Debra Fileta

Dating rules and advice can change with the passing of time.

(Hence, I Kissed Dating Goodbye in 1990 vs True Love Dates in 2018- which is $1.99 on Kindle right now for all you bargain hunters out there 😉 )

But there are a few concepts about dating and relationships that won’t change no matter what’s going on in our culture.

Today’s caller is looking for some dating advice. She’s wondering how to know if she’s giving a relationship enough time to play out, or if she’s ending the relationships too early.


In today’s episode, I’m going to talk her through some basic dating rules using the red, green, and yellow flag concept.

The greens are the things you need in a a relationship – things you’re on the lookout for.

The yellows are your preferences, or even the unknowns  – things that will probably end up either in the red, or the green category with time.

And the reds are the things you’ll never, ever, settle for – things that signify it’s time to STOP this relationship.

You’ve got to understand and know your reds, greens, and yellows in order to have a chance at a successful dating relationship. You need to get good at recognizing what works, from what doesn’t. Because you’ve have to know when to keep moving forward in a relationship, and when to walk away.

Tune in to Episode 019 of the Love + Relationships Podcast today, and let’s talk through your red, green, and yellow list!


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Resources Mentioned on the Love + Relationships Podcast and Additional Show Notes:

Enjoyed this episode of the podcast? Check out the episode about Junk Food Relationships: Healthy Relationships Aren’t Convenient

Or check out this mini episode and find out what I think about the concept of “Finding The One“.

Get busy learning what you need to know about healthy singleness, dating, and marriage. Check out Choosing Marriage: Why It Has To Start With We > Me or True Love Dates: Your Indispensable Guide to Finding the Love of Your Life.

Choosing Marriage Christian Dating Book

DEBRA FILETA is a Licensed Professional Counselor, national speaker, relationship expert, and author of Choosing Marriage and True Love Dates. She’s also the host of the hotline style Love + Relationships Podcast. Her popular relationship advice blog,, reaches millions of people with the message of healthy relationships. Connect with her on FacebookInstagram, or Twitter