The #1 Way People Are Getting Asked Out

In Dating by Debra Fileta

I’ve been scoping out #TheDatingScene among Christian singles across the country. If you’re new to this blog, I took a poll asking singles to tell me their experience with regard to the world of dating and I’ve been analyzing and revealing the many results in this blog series. You can catch up on the series by clicking here.

I think we would all say that #TheDatingScene has undoubtedly changed over the past decade with the prevalence of social media and technology. I would imagine that 15 years ago, asking someone on a date was as simple as walking up to them, introducing yourself, and asking them for their phone number or seeing if they were interested in grabbing a bite to eat. If you wanted to get to know someone, you HAD to take initiative because social media wasn’t really a thing. If you wanted to stay in touch, you had to actively make it happen. 

In fact, that’s exactly what happened with John and I. We met at a conference, went out for a game of mini golf with a group of mutual friends, and by the next day of the conference he had asked me for my phone number. Our friendship developed long distance (he lived in Boston, I lived in Virginia) and fast forward over a decade of marriage and three children later, we’re still BFFs and completely in love. (You can read our entire story with-a-bunch-of-other-nitty-gritty-juicy-details about our love-life here).

But times have changed, right? Though exactly how much have times changed?

According to this survey: a lot.

I asked singles to tell me HOW they have gotten asked out on a date over the past 6 months. The #1 way people are getting asked on dates is……………

Text Message.

Yep. That’s correct. As in “texting”.

38% reported that they are asking/getting asked out on dates via text message.

29% are still going the old-fashion way of face-to-face.

About 18% are using social media to ask someone on a date.

And lastly, about 15% are using the good ol’ phone call.

So apparently, texting is the big thing right now.

I’ve heard people say that “real men don’t text”. But if that’s true, what does that say about the state of dating?

I personally think it’s less important HOW you ask someone on a date, and more important WHO you chose to ask – someone who is healthy, mature, and displays good character.

At the end of the day, just by asking you’re ahead of 71% of Christian singles (who AREN’T asking AT ALL).

Anyway, I’d love to keep this conversation going:

Comment below: How do you feel about “texting” winning by a landslide? Would you be okay with someone texting you to ask you out? Why or why not? If you’ve texted someone to ask them out, why did you choose that particular way of asking? What role does technology and social media play in the whole dating scene?

Debra Fileta is a Professional Counselor, national speaker, relationship expert, and author of True Love Dates: Your Indispensable Guide to Finding the Love of Your Life, where she writes candidly about dating, relationships, and how to find true love. Her newest book, Choosing Marriage, is set to be released in the Summer of 2018! You may also recognize her voice from her 200+ articles at Relevant Magazine,, and all over the web! She’s the creator of this True Love Dates Blog, reaching over 4 million people with the message that healthy people make healthy relationships!  Connect with her on Facebook or Twitter or book a session with her today!

Ready to take initiative, get your dating-life started, and meet some other singles?

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OR check out this related Audio Lesson for some inspiration: