How To Kill Worry

In Advice and Encouragement by Debra Fileta

Matthew 6:34  Do not worry about tomorrow…

Yeah.  I know what you’re thinking, “easier said than done”.  It’s true. Dealing with worries can be such a difficult thing.

This concept (that is all throughout scripture) is probably one of the hardest of God’s words to actually follow.  “Do not murder”, “Do not steal”…those we can probably handle if we really focus, but “Do not worry*”, well, that one seems slightly overambitious.

I know, because I am a worrier by nature.  I’m one of those people who learned to worry, even as a little kid. I find it hard to let go of control and allow life to just happen.  Even today, I find myself preoccupied with a little bit of worry.  Things – big and small – that can aggressively consume my mind if I’m not careful.

But over the years I’ve come to depend on a few cognitive doctrines to help me wrestle with the intrusiveness of my worry. I’ve learned that there are steps that I can take, both as a professional counselor, and as a human being, that can drastically alter my tendency to worry. I’ll share them with you.

1. Take worry seriously.  Don’t allow yourself to worry about anything– from things as simple as the weather to things as serious as your loved ones.  I say allow, because believe it or not, worrying is a choice. It’s an act that we willfully partake in by how and what we allow ourselves to think. It is like a poison, that can easily spread into every part of your life and eventually conquer your reality. But in order to stop worrying, we have to first see it for the dangerous thing that it is.

2. Remember that worry is not from God.  It’s not an innocent process of “thinking through things” as we may try to justify it.  Worry is directly linked to fear, and where there is fear, there is a lack of faith.  These thoughts of worry are not from God, and the longer we allow them to permeate our minds the more we are distancing ourselves from God’s perspective and pulling away from His presence. Staying in tune to God’s voice means recognizing that worrisome thoughts are not from Him.

3. Consider what worry is replacing: What is worry really taking the place of in our lives? The answer to that question is this: Prayer.  When we worry, we are allowing thoughts that could be devoted to prayer to be sidetracked as fuel for our anxiety.  Worry plays the part of our prayers, and in the end, nothing gets accomplished.  Why worry, when we can use those same thoughts to do something that really matters? Connect with God and trust Him for what you can’t control.

4. Remember, something supernatural happens when we deliberately choose to give our worries to God in prayer.  You don’t have to understand it, and you can’t explain it, because it doesn’t make any sense, but it’s guaranteed.  Our Lord promises it.  When we act on what we believe, God exchanges our worry for true, unrivaled peace. When we walk in faith, we move away from fear. And when we pray, we invite Almighty God to invade our situation. God says it himself!

Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. (Philippians 4:6-7).

So whatever is on your mind today, consider killing your worries by committing to prayer. And I promise to pray for you, too. If you’re comfortable, leave your request in the comment section below. Instead of allowing our minds to worry, let’s do something meaningful instead. Let’s pray. Let’s believe. Let’s expect.

*As a Professional Counselor, I wholeheartedly believe there is a difference between general worry, and clinical anxiety. If you struggle with worry that rules your life more days than not, impacting your social, emotional, and occupational life – seek professional counseling to get yourself started on the path toward healing and hope!

Is there an area in your life where you want to get unstuck this year?

The Debra Fileta Counselors Network is officially open and taking new clients! These online sessions are GOING FAST but we still have some sessions left for the month of July!

I started this Counselors Network to provide a high-quality, faith-based, counseling-focused resource for clients who are struggling in any area in their personal or relational life.

It’s a network of Licensed Professional Counselors who are trained and supervised under me, integrating faith and psychology to help people truly heal from the inside out.

For a list of our counselors and their specialties, and to book a session, please visit:

DEBRA FILETA is a Licensed Professional Counselor, national speaker, relationship expert, and bestselling author of five books including Are You Really OK?Choosing Marriage, True Love Dates, Love In Every Season, and Married Sex. She’s the host of the hotline style Love + Relationships Podcast where she candidly answers caller questions about love, sex, dating, and mental and emotional health. She’s also the creator of the popular relationship advice blog, Together, her blog and podcast reaches millions of people each year with the message that healthy people make healthy relationships. She’s had the privilege of speaking at churches and ministries all over the country including FreshLife Church, Saddleback Church, Focus on the Family, 700 Club, and Better Together on TBN. Connect with her on FacebookInstagram, or book an online session with her today.