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This One Thing Is The Enemy of Love

In Advice and Encouragement, Relationships by Debra Fileta3 Comments

Have you ever wished you had what someone else has?

Have you ever longed for the wealth, the success, the fame, the ministry, the relationship status, or the financial stability of another person?

Have you ever taken even a moment, to compare your life to another’s?

Whether we wish to acknowledge it or not, I believe all of us have succumbed to the feeling of envy in some way, shape, or form over the course of our life (or even over the course of our day!).

And with the rise of social media, we are all the more susceptible to envy. How easy is it to have a front row seat into the highlight reel of another person’s life. We’re constantly bombarded with engagement photos, wedding announcements, relationship status updates, job promotions, and children’s photos…and everything we seemingly don’t have, but want.

But as we dissect the traits of true love outlined in 1 Corinthians 13 in this #LoveIs series, we realize that envy is actually the enemy of love.

Envy is the enemy of love because it causes us to focus on what God is NOT doing in our lives, rather than seeing what He IS doing (TWEET IT!).

It’s the enemy of love because it takes our eyes off of the blessings we have, and instead puts them on what others have – filling us with bitterness, resentment, and hate.

It’s the enemy of love because it keeps us from enjoying our lives here and now – constantly wondering if others are enjoying their lives more.

Envy is the enemy of love, because it not only robs us of our ability to love God and others, but it also robs us from being able to love ourselves.

How can we genuinely love God when we’re always questioning His goodness in our lives? How can we genuinely love others, when we’re always wishing for what they have? And how can we genuinely love ourselves, when we always feel like we’re coming up lacking?

Love does not envy, because it is only when envy dies that we can stop fixating on ourselves and begin reaching into the lives of others in significant and meaningful ways. It is only when envy dies that we can genuinely put the best interest of others before our own. It is only when envy dies that we can be content with the place God has us, rather than battling that constant nagging feeling that we “should be” or “could be” somewhere better.

And it is only when envy dies that we can then begin to see and appreciate ourselves for who we really are: fearfully, wonderfully, and intricately made. Right here. And right now.

May God help us all to put away envy, as we learn to really love others…yet also, begin to really love ourselves.

Comment below: How has envy kept you from loving God, others, or yourself? 

Debra Fileta is a Professional Counselor, national speaker, and author of the book True Love Dates: Your Indispensable Guide to Finding the Love of Your Life, and 21 Days to Jump Start Your Love Life, where she writes candidly about dating, relationships, and how to find true love. You may also recognize her voice from her 150+ articles at Relevant Magazine or Crosswalk.com! She’s also the creator of this True Love Dates Blog!  Connect with her on Facebook or Twitter

For more posts on envy check out: No One’s Telling The Truth on Facebook, and The Facebook Envy Effect

Catch up on the ENTIRE #LoveIs Series by clicking on the photo below or subscribing to my blog!

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Comments

  1. Oye

    Hmmmm… for this reason I chose to cool off on my social media time, like a whole lot. I realised it was breeding discontent. Im not there yet but I am on my way. Thanks for this

  2. Colette

    Thank you for this great post! Envy and comparing myself to others is something I have struggled on and off with. Facebook and other social media do not help as we are constantly seeing posts about the very things we want in our lives but do not currently have. Sometimes stepping back from social media can be a good thing. I personally choose not to broadcast my entire life on social media. I often need the reminder to be grateful for the things I have in my life at this moment. I know that I am fearfully and wonderfully made and nothing can change that. Thank you again for this, Debra.

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