5 Reasons 50 Shades of Grey is TRASH

In For the Ladies, Marriage, Relationships, Uncategorized by Debra Fileta131 Comments

To say I’m appalled by the positive reaction to 50 Shades of Grey is an understatement.

But what’s even more alarming to me, is the mass amount of attention and praise both the book series and upcoming film has received from CHRISTIAN WOMEN.

It’s a story line filled with dysfunction, pain, and sexual perversion played out between a young 22-year old virgin and a seriously disturbed 27-year old man. I have to start my post by saying I didn’t read the actual book, nor do I ever plan on doing so. I couldn’t justify filling my mind with trash for the sake of writing this article (for you critics out there, I read one-too-many summaries, spoke to people who’ve read the series, and did research of my own). But what it comes down to is that you don’t need to watch porn to be against it, nor have experienced abuse to be able to stand up for what’s right. And just the same, you don’t have to read trash to be able to declare it as such.

I, for one, am officially declaring this entire 50 Shades of Grey movement as T.R.A.S.H.; portraying an inaccurate view of:

Theology,  Relationship Advice and Sexual History

It’s destructive to relationships, poisonous to the mind, harmful to sexuality, and deadly to the soul. As both a Professional Counselor and Christian woman, here are 5 reasons why I believe it’s complete and total TRASH:

1. It portrays a relationship defined by SEX rather than a relationship defined by LOVE.

Aside from the fact that the story line of 50 Shades glorifies sex outside of marriage, even more destructive is that it defines an entire relationship by SEX.  It’s a plot that looks at a relationship between a young man and woman through the lens of nothing more than the dynamics of their sexual relationship. Talk about a seriously lacking view of relationships! I’m appalled by how this story cheapens relationships by condensing the complexity and sanctity between a man and a woman down to this one thing. The moment we define our relationships by our sex lives, is the moment that we’ve failed to experience relationships to their fullest. Great relationships are never just about sex (though great sex is the FRUIT of a great marriage!) they are about LOVE, they are about INTIMACY, they are about WISDOM, they are about LOYALTY, and finally, they are about COMMITMENT.

2. It defines love as an act of TAKING rather than an act of GIVING.

Even though this entire story line is about sex, the word love and being “in love” is used fairly often from what I gather in the summaries of the series. But the problem here is that this “love” is always defined by what it can get, rather than what it can give. From the start, both parties are in it to GET something. To get sex, to get security, to get healing, to get pleasure. But true love is never about what we can get, but rather, what we are enabled to give. Throughout this story line the themes of anger, rage, violence, abuse, dysfunction, and hurt emerge time and time again. But what a poor picture of love that really is. True love is never out to hurt, instead it’s defined by kindness, patience, gentleness. It’s defined by self-control- not self indulgence. By forgiveness, not wounded-ness. True love is an act of selflessness, which is the farthest thing portrayed in 50 Shades of Grey.

3. It presents pleasure as rooted in DYSFUNCTION, rather than rooted in INTIMACY.

It saddens me to hear that so many woman are enthralled, excited, and turned on by this story line because it is all about pleasure rooted in dysfunction. Since when is pleasure defined by bondage, dominance, and masochism? Since when is arousal dependent on pain, abuse, fear, hurt, and violence? This sickest part of this story line is that it makes light of some serious sexual dysfunction rooted in the main character’s past abuse history. How often do we bring our wounds to relationships in hopes for healing? But a relationship rooted in dysfunction will never survive, because relationships can’t heal our wounds, mend our insecurities, or cover up our past. They weren’t meant to, because only God can do that (but that’s an article for another day).

Rather than pleasure that’s rooted in pain, what about looking for pleasure that’s rooted in intimacy, love, and trust? I’m thankful that God’s design for sex includes SAFETY and SECURITY within the walls of a loving marriage offering us pleasure beyond measure rooted in intimacy, commitment, loyalty, and respect. And please don’t misunderstand- there is SO MUCH FREEDOM for sexual pleasure in marriage, because ultimately, it is pleasure rooted in the enthralling intimacy of love.

4. It presents a one-dimensional, cheap, and superficial view of sex rather than seeing sex as valuable, deep and meaningful.

It’s amazing how many women will get worked up about their husband’s viewing pornography, but then get excited by the story line of 50 Shades. Yet since when is lust in women more acceptable than lust in men? Just as cheaply as pornography takes the sacredness of sex and turns it into a one-dimensional self-serving act, 50 shades does the exact same thing. It fixates on the physical components of sexual connection, while completely neglecting the emotional, psychological, and spiritual connections involved in the truest form of sexual intimacy. Sex is so much more than physical. If we could only learn to view sex in every dimension, then maybe we would learn to savor it, respect it, cherish it and honor it rather than frivolously giving it away.

5. It OBJECTIFIES women (and men) instead of EMPOWERING them.

After getting a closer look at this novel, I was surprised to find so many woman singing it’s praises. 50 Shades is the sad story of a man who was objectified through past sexual abuse, objectifying woman after woman along the way. The only truth I find in this whole predicament is the reality that: “Hurt people, hurt people”. It’s a story of hurt,and brokenness, and wounds finding their outlet in the form of dysfunctional sexual expression. And if that’s the kind of thing that turns you on- you might need to take a step back and do some soul-searching. It encourages both men and women to fall into the trap that our bodies hold the solution, and that sex can somehow hold the answer.

I revolt against this mentality with all my heart, because I know full well that the answer is not – and can never be- found in sex, in romance, or in relationships of any form- because the Answer is found in nothing short of Love.

If there’s anything I take away from the 50 Shades epidemic it’s this: Our cultural obsession with sex is telling. It’s telling, because SEX is just a symptom of something far greater. Ultimately, it’s a symptom that we are DESPERATE for connection. We’re desperate for relationship, desperate for love, and oh so desperate to be wanted. And while the TRASH of this world may offer some temporary relief, it will never leave us feeling fulfilled, whole, and satisfied. Because it doesn’t have the power to. 

I am thankful for a God who has provided the answers to fulfill my deepest needs, heal my deepest wounds, and satisfy my greatest longings. I am thankful for a God who offers to fill us with His living water, and fill us to overflowing.

Because it is only when we are truly filled, that we can learn the art of filling others…and in marriage, it’s that kind of love that will make for some really incredible sex.

If you agree, share this article! Let’s make some noise. 

Update 2/11/15: For more on the harms of 50 Shades of Grey, check out the advocacy work being done by the National Center for Sexual Exploitation.

Debra Fileta is a Professional Counselor, speaker, and author of True Love Dates: Your Indispensable Guide to Finding the Love of Your Life21 Days to Jump Start Your Love Life, and 21 Days to Pray For Your Love Life – where she writes candidly about dating, relationships, and how to find true love. You may also recognize her voice from her 150+ articles at Relevant Magazine or Crosswalk.com! She’s also the creator of this True Love Dates Blog!  Connect with her on Facebook or Twitter!

Check out some of our TLD Resources:

1. Are you ready for Love? Take my FREE Quiz right now to find out! 

2. Want to learn how to date in a healthy way that will help you find and keep love? Check out my book True Love Dates: Your Indispensable Guide to Finding the Love of Your Life! Plus, read the Top 25 Dating Questions of All-Time answered in Section 4!!

3. The #1 Mistake singles reported making last year was not taking a risk to start a relationship! Why do Christians tend to be so passive when it comes to relationships? Join hundreds of other singles and take a course that will teach you the top lessons I’ve learned in my career as a Relationship Counselor, and totally change your love-life in 21 Days! Learn more: 21-Day Program to Jump Start Your Love-Life!

Leave a Reply

131 Comments on "5 Reasons 50 Shades of Grey is TRASH"

Notify of
avatar
Sort by:   newest | oldest | most voted
Alexis
Guest
Wow. Thank you for expressing in this article, my thoughts exactly! My husband asked me last night if I wanted to go with my girlfriends and see this movie. I said I have no interest seeing someone having sex and corrupting this poor girl. What is the plot? I don’t care to see someone’s sexual escapades. There is no love, no murder plot, no interesting story line. It is interesting that women are going to see this movie with each other instead of their husbands, why? People see a romantic movie with their husband or significant other in hopes to… Read more »
Josh
Guest

What’s interesting is your argument is invalid as you clearly prefaced this article with the fact that you have not read or intend to read this book. Which means your criticism of its themes are blind judgements. Which, since we’re talking Christianity, from a biblical standout is a sin. You contradict yourself by condemning sins while committing the sin of judgment. “Judge not, less you be judged sayeth the lord”.

Fran
Guest

Dear Josh, for us Christians, if we know some book is about sex and sex not treated in a healthy way, for that only reason we should avoid reading that book.

Thank you Deb for this article. I am absolutely agreed with you!

steph
Guest
This article is totally incorrect. At the BEGINING of their relationship it was based on sex. She didn’t know he was a Dom right away. If you read the books you would see that it is a beautiful love story. It shows how strong relationships can change people. He loved her so much he quit his way of life to be with her. I am a Christian and I loved the book. Just because you are Christian doesn’t mean you can’t read books about harmful things and sex. And also sex is a beautiful thing between two people who love… Read more »
Aaron
Guest

Just because it’s hard to find people who wait for marriage in order to have sex doesn’t mean that it’s not ideal. God wants things for us that are far better than what we want for ourselves.

Jinny
Guest
I agree with josh, and everyone who reads something depicts and preceives it differently. Though I understand your opinion. Also the book is not fully about sex. It is just what is taboo about it/what people aren’t use to talking about..which is sad. I like how the book makes it easier for people to actually talk about it, whatever someone’s opinion about sex is. Just because your opinion is different doesn’t mean it’s trash.There is always more to a story. There is romance, tragity, drama, and comedy in throughout the books, so please don’t be so judgemental, no one is… Read more »
Brandy
Guest
Josh, Actually, what the Bible says in Matthew is this:”“Judge not, that you be not judged. For with what judgment you judge, you will be judged; and with the measure you use, it will be measured back to you. And why do you look at the speck in your brother’s eye, but do not consider the plank in your own eye? Or how can you say to your brother, ‘Let me remove the speck from your eye’; and look, a plank is in your own eye? Hypocrite! First remove the plank from your own eye, and then you will see… Read more »
Jason
Guest

Well you’ll only use that verse to justify watever ur indulging urself in Josh,you would probably also say ‘Only God can judge me’ well let me cue you in that’s worse.Judge not doesn’t mean you should see what is wrong and turn a blind eye to it ,read d whole thing it simply means you should judge righteously ‘remove the log from your eyes before you remove the speck from your brother’s eyes.This book is trash and the movie too

Sandi
Guest

I don’t have to take herion, meth or whatever illicit drug that is destroying lives to know it’s not going to do anything to better my life. This is the same for not reading this book. I know what’s in it garbage. We are so blinded by how corrupt the world is today that if Hollywood puts a flashy spin on it, it’s ok. No. Perversion is just that garbage. Be fooled if you want to. But this mom of an impressionable teenage girl says no to reading and seeing this destructive story.

Appologetic
Guest

My objection is that she does not cite her sources. My opinion on this work is based on the following

Bum Reviews: 50 shades of Grey

Film theory: The Cult of Christian Grey

Reading with a Vengence: 50 shades of Grey

you don’t need mla style, just make it so that someone else can easily find your research and see how you formed that opinion.

Melinda Galloway
Guest

I totally agree with you Debra. Thank you for taking a stand 🙂

Ganise
Guest

Right there with you, Sister. It’s a horrendous movement for sure and with the coming of its movie, we, as a Church need to stand strongly against it. Check out the work Dannah Gresh and Dr. Julie Slattery have been doing. They’ve been very openly critical about the movement especially in their book Pulling Back the Shades.

sherrian watford
Guest

Thank you so much, I lost my way w/ sex but you hit the nail on the head!!

Antonia
Guest

Thank you for this article. I’ll pass this along to my many single christian friends. I purchased the books, but then sold them because I felt convicted. I’m looking for the REAL Godly love. All my past relationships were based on all the wrong things and I’m working on my wholeness before God sends me my mate. My desire is to please Him now and be more faithful.

Sophie
Guest
Thanks for this article, Debra! I had heard some things here and there about this movie and book but I’m now certain that I am not going to watch or read it. Debra, do you have any guidelines for when making choices for TV, movies and books? I have tried to go by “Is this something Jesus would be displeased about me watching (or doing, reading)?” when trying to discern if something is acceptable or not and that leaves about 99.99% to be unacceptable. So the only thing left to do is to read the Bible, it seems. :-/ I’d… Read more »
Ganise
Guest

Dear Sophie, I, too, have been wondering about this. Nice to hear Debra will be addressing this issue.

Kat
Guest
Sophie ~ I don’t have all the answers – not even most of them. I can share with you what I learned about Christian romance. I don’t think I have issue with the mild hints of sexual longings … that just means that they are human. All of us had to deal with that when dating. However, where Christian romance tends to get into trouble is that they are written by women. Why is that a problem? Women don’t think like men. We can write like we perceive men think, yet they can think in ways that are really alien… Read more »
Sam
Guest

Kat, I think you hit the nail on the head, and I think it is one of the reasons I have always loved Gilbert Morris, especially his House of Winslow Series and Wakefield Dynasty Series. Since he is actually writing from a male perspective, his male characters are very realistic with plenty of character flaws (yet, I always ended up falling for them despite that). Also, I think he probably does the best historical research for his books, which brings the realism to a whole new level.

Sam
Guest
As far as books go, most Classic literature is clean and much better than most new stuff out there anyway. Charlotte Bronte, Robert Louis Stevenson, Jane Austen, Louisa May Alcott, Sir Arthur Conan Doyle, just to name a few great classic authors. There are also some good Christian novelists out there. If you like adventure and romance, look up George Bryan Polivka. His Trophy Chase Trilogy is AMAZING! Also, Gilbert Morris and Liz Curtis Higgs are probably my two favorite Christian novelists. They do great research for their books and write very realistic stories while weaving in the ultimate story… Read more »
Briana
Guest
Sophie, I love your heart for doing what is right. Reading the Bible should be your first step, not last resort. You know, God wants to speak truth to your heart, not just about this movie title or that show title, but he wants to fill your life with knowledge, wisdom and discernment that can only come from knowing his Word. Start somewhere simple like Philippians or read the gospels. Then pray for him to fill you with his Holy Spirit and ask him to help you understand what you read. King David said, “I have hidden your word in… Read more »
Sarah Nezar
Guest

Hi Sophie, Janette Oke is a brilliant Christian Author & her Love Comes Softly series is wonderful & full of a wonderful Christian theme. God bless you.

Kristen
Guest
Sophie, Much like anything else.. I think that movies, books, music etc (any form of ‘entertainment’) has and always will be different from person to person. I know that God has changed my desires, therefor there are certain films and such that I will stay away from, because it is not pleasurable to God. I think that God convicts us all just fine on his own and I am sure that you have a good idea for yourself what is good and what is bad. I think also our mindset is what is most important.. I personally don’t think harry… Read more »
Missy
Guest
Everyone is entitled to your own opinion but I have read all 3 books and yes it is about sex. But really it is not about subjecting anyone. It is about a man who is lost in his ways because sex is the only way to coup with everything he has been through. But when he finds Ana she changes all that . Yes they have a sexual relationship but they are both adults. And the story is how they both change and they do it together. And I am sorry but unfortunately not many people wait any more to… Read more »
Glenna
Guest
Thank you, Missy. I too have read the books and agree with your sentiments. Yes, the books were “hyped” over their sexual content, but anyone who took the time to read them could appreciate the full transformation that takes place in the story. I also don’t think it’s fair for people to “trash” something based on the word of others. The same way I don’t appreciate people trashing or bashing the Bible without ever flipping a page. Now I am in NO WAY comparing the Bible to 50 Shades of Grey, but I’ve had more friends turned away from Christianity… Read more »
Cheryl
Guest
Thank you! While some may object to the book because of sexual content, I do not like the bashing of any book/art form. Is it for everyone? No. Some may argue that it shouldn’t be for anyone; however, we must all work out our own salvation. Book bans and bashing only spark further interest in the taboo. If a couple (Christian or not) desires to see this together, they should not be faced with any form of judgement. It’s fiction, which is created for personal enjoyment. I read the entire series to be able to judge for myself. Honestly, it… Read more »
Meji
Guest

Amen to that, Cheryl!

Jinny
Guest

I’ll be at the movies too!

amber
Guest

Same here. I see this issue the same way.

Gen
Guest

I totally agree with what you said. As a christian woman I have no desire to read any of that garbage or see it either. I know many christian women who have read the book and I was in total shock that they did. I wish more people would take the stand that you did and call it what it is!
It’s funny how you called it trash, I’ve always called it garbage. Just calling it what it is!! Lol

nydelene
Guest

Very good! I’m turning 20 this year.. thank you for writing this article.. “I am thankful for a Godffers to fill us with His living water, and fill us to overflowing.
Because it is only when we are truly filled, that we can learn the art of filling others” this was really a reminder for me 🙂

Vincent Ortega
Guest

I totally agree with you Debra, whatever our society puts out regarding a book or movie. Thankfully the holy spirit leads me away from this type of trash that is unhealthy for my mind, but remember Debra the majority of the masses without a thought listen and follow our mass media garbage. Debra, I enjoy reading your articles they are very interesting and helpful. God bless you!

TKL
Guest
“If there’s anything I take away from the 50 Shades epidemic it’s this: Our cultural obsession with sex is telling. It’s telling, because SEX is just a symptom of something far greater. Ultimately, it’s a symptom that we are DESPERATE for connection. We’re desperate for relationship, desperate for love, and oh so desperate to be wanted.” 100% truth. Wow. I know I’m desperate for a relationship/love/to be wanted. God has put those desires in my heart and I’m trying to be patient and allow Him to fulfill those needs on His schedule… but it’s challenging. His plan/timing are different than… Read more »
Eagles
Guest

Thanks for your stand against Biblical misinterpretation especially in its Sexual context. TRASH littered around, enveloping our minds in the wrongest precepts. Thanks for you, Debra.

Rachel
Guest
There has to be something in this book that makes Christian women think it’s acceptable. It’s clearly a deception, makes me think about Eve and the snake (devil) in the garden of Eden. From the beginning I knew to stay far far far away from this book and now the movie. But I’m always curious about the author of a book, and I read that she said that all her fantasies are in this book. How dangerous is that, because now millions of women are filling their minds with the fantasy of one women who I strongly believe is involved… Read more »
jessy
Guest
It is indeed a deep deception. Thanks for the reminder. As believers we are in great jeopardy of falling into deception when we cease to abide in the words of God; “if you continue in my words, then are you my disciples indeed ” John 8: 31. We are constantly falling for the same lie as in the beginning. ” He is keeping something from us. He cannot be trusted. There is better out there ” You want to be happy and totally fulfilled in all areas of life ? obey the Lord. ” young man, its wonderful to be… Read more »
vincent
Guest

Deb, I am glad for your stand and boldness to speak against that trash of a movie. Ride on, your good works is appreciated.

Kaylie
Guest
Debra, While I completely agree with how much our society seems to be obsessed with sex, undervalues the other characteristics of relationships, and puts physical intimacy for the sake of “getting and not giving”on a pedestal, I do think you are taking this film (and book series) out of context, especially in regards to how christian women should view it. First of all, while I respect that you voiced your opinion over a rather sensitive subject, It seems very one sided because of the fact that you haven’t read the book or seen the movie. It reminds me of one… Read more »
Monica
Guest

Yes!!!! I also agree with you!! Wow.

Daniel
Guest

Thank you Debra……Perverted sex (any sex outside of God’s design) is the number one cause for human and community failure. Nations fall! There is a reason God speaks so much and so clearly about His precious gift we blaspheme at our convenience. May God Almighty be merciful to us as a nation and a people. It’s that serious!

Kaylie
Guest

Debra,
Thanks for clarifying, and I think it’s great that you have been able to reach other women in a positive way and give them another way to think about this subject.

Freddie
Guest

Good for you that God has satisfied your greatest longings etc. Until he bothers to do any of that for me, I’ll keep complaining. Eventually, when I’m tired of being drained rather than filled, I guess I’ll just give up though, like I did with dating.

Adrian
Guest

Totally agreed. It’s a controversial book that glorified abusive relationships and perverted acts. No one should derive gratification and be content with such a relationship. Poisonous for the young and impressionable minds. The book has sold for more than 100 million copies world wide, quite certain that a big chunk of them goes to teenagers. This article is timely, especially when the movie is coming out soon.

Judith
Guest

Thanks Debra! I strongly agree wt u and these are my exact thoughts.
We can only be complete in Christ, nothing else can make us complete.

Rhoda
Guest

I totally agree with your stand Debra. It’s rather unfortunate that we live in a generation of so much dysfunctionality where a lot of Christians don’t even know where to draw the line.
God help this generation.

I love this line:
“I am thankful for a God who has provided the answers to fulfill my deepest needs, heal my deepest wounds, and satisfy my greatest longings. I am thankful for a God who offers to fill us with His living water, and fill us to overflowing”.

Thank you for taking a stand for Jesus. God bless you real good.

Taylor
Guest

Wow Debra, I’m so grateful for your heart in sharing this post. I hope you know the Holy Spirit is using it to draw people to himself. And I’m sure satan will in turn use it to try and divide. It honestly just hurts my heart to see women, especially married women, that I know be so into this book. I’m thankful for a voice like yours that can speak some truth in love. Just, thank you. Be encouraged!

anon
Guest

Thanks Debra!
Just wanted to say that your stance on this issue is backed by research from the Journal of Women’s Health and Clinical Psychology. Check out this article on “50 Shades” from the Gospel Coalition, I found out very helpful as well. 🙂

http://www.thegospelcoalition.org/article/fifty-shades-twilight-and-teaching-young-women-to-desire-abusers

Allison
Guest
First of all, I won’t bash anything that’s been said in this article; everyone is entitled to their opinion and to share it. Secondly, I only have one major problem with this article…your uneducated portrayal of a BDSM relationship. As a woman who practices it with my husband, I can absolutely tell you that bdsm relationships are founded in mutual love, respect, and trust; how else would someone know as soon as they were tied up they’d be let up again? Finally, yes fifty shades is smut. Yes it doesn’t do “my kind” of relationship justice. And as far as… Read more »
Bec
Guest
If you would read the book you would realize that they fall in love with each other, and she makes him take responsibility for the way he was treating women. She also stands up for herself and does not allow him to objectify her the way he wants. You learn the reason why he is the way he is, and he continues to fix it by seeking help. He learns to love her and allows her to become a strong independent women. They get married and then she becomes pregnant with his child, and he struggles with that because he… Read more »
Graciela
Guest

Thanks Debra for writing this!! ☺ Although most of my friends don’t speak english, I will make some noise against this TRASH movie in Latinoamerica. But also I think it’s important to make some noise in social media with hashtags or memes, so we can aware young girls to not see this movie. I’ll post something on my twitter page and on instagram, I just need to be creative…
God Bless you Debra, I really look up to you 🙂

Anna
Guest
Debra, after reading through all the comments, I really appreciate the upright, tactful way you deal with people who speak an opposing view. That is a great sign of Gods work going on in and through you. Thanks for being the voice of reason in an overly-sexualized culture. I remember being a teenager and younger married woman and could see how my thoughts and struggles were exemplified by what I watched, read, and listened to. I struggled with wanting to be loved as a teenager and the more I put sexualized movies, TV, and music in my brain, that was… Read more »
Bobbi Moore
Guest

I havent read the book or books and really not interested, some of my friends have and are counting down the days till movie is out. I have to agree trash. I see the woman who are so excited about 50 shades of gray, are not happy in their marriages or divorced. Myself will not being reading the book or going to see the movie.When did we bring somewhat “porn” to our family movie places??? SMH!!!!!

Carole
Guest

Thank You so much for succinctly expressing my exact feelings about love and making love rather than “having sex”. I haven’t read the book Shades of Gray for the same reason you haven’t read it. Like you, I didn’t need to read it to come to the same conclusion. You expressed my feelings more than I ever could or ever have been able to. Thank You.

Katie
Guest

Christ died for our purity. We SHOULD fight for it, defend it and preserve it… Keep writing and seeking Debra, because one day we’ll stand before the Lord and oh how we’ll long for him to say “Well done, my good and faithful servant.” 🙂 xo

Jerilyn Van Winkle
Guest
Debra I am a Christian too.. And since becoming a Christian years ago my heart has changed.. I know the Holy Spirit is in me.. And am an older lady too.. But never did have the desire to read these type of books.. But the world is so different than the innocent world I grew up in.. And made a lot of mistakes due to ignorance when growing up as teenager in the 1950s.. But learned from them and never made the same mistake twice except picking the wrong Husband twice.. And now have been married 36 years in a… Read more »
joan
Guest

a completely invalid statement, you didn’t read the book, and as if you haven’t really noticed today’s generation of relationship usually starts with a sexual encounter in stead of actually “falling in love” very sad but true. I honestly found this and interesting book only because people actually react to life this way.

Erin
Guest

I have read the series and will attest to the fact that it is poorly written. However, I have to disagree with #4 on your list. For the psychologically damaged character of Mr. Grey, sex is superficial, but the protagonist changes everything he knows, so that he finally CAN see sex as valuable, deep and meaningful. You would have to read the text, of course, to know this.

Ashliegh
Guest

Exactly.

Dee
Guest
I found some of the comments here interesting. I do believe this ‘younger’ generation puts more emphasis on ‘sex’ rather than the ‘relationship’. I agree it all comes from what people see on TV and in the movies and yes, even books. While I have not read this particular book, I’ve read some very similar and I honestly have no interest in reading this book or seeing the movie. The sad part for some people is they read this stuff and fantasize that, THAT is the kind of relationship and/or man or woman they would love to have…not realizing….they don’t… Read more »
Portia
Guest
I don’t understand why this movie is bad. Someone can sit in a theater and watch the bloodiest movie filled with lies hate and murder and it will be fine, it’s just and movie. But a movie that’s plot is has to do with a young women trapped in a sexual relationship with a man is soooooooo horrible. It’s just a movie about the sexual aspects of a relationship. The couple may not be normal or traditional but that’s what makes the book (I haven’t seen the movie yet so idk about that). It’d about the characters and how they… Read more »
Lauren
Guest
Thank you for this article. Expressing truth like this is often difficult and frustrating because of two great lies people have come to believe: that we must experience or sample something to be able to identify its character, and that Christians are commanded not to judge. Do you need to eat moldy cheese to know it tastes bad? Must we jump in a puddle to confirm there’s mud in the bottom? To say one cannot form conclusions about something just because they haven’t immersed themselves in it to the full extent is silly. We do that every day as humans.… Read more »
Larissa Johnson
Guest

i am happy to know that i am not alone in the fact that i hate seeing my husband watch porn… so i would very much hate it if we watched this movie together.. it looks horrible!!! and what a horrible thing for a virgin to start out with… bondage sex.
sex and love is not supposed to be like that!

Cher
Guest

You clearly didn’t read the books – it starts out toxic, but they grow together through hurts, pains, tragedy… they become a solid, Christian couple with a loving family – married, babies, everything. Skip the “bad” parts – it really isn’t as bad as everyone makes it out to be. I’m very Catholic – still contemplating sisterhood – you only take away what you want.

Teo
Guest
Cher darling I am very sorry,but I am going to break your fantasy and wake you up to reality.I also didn’t read the book but I heard what it is about and about certain scenes that really disturbed me.Now I will break it to you as nicely as I can:This is freaking fiction!You won’t find something like that in real life(Thank God for that).Normal and mentally healthy women won’t stay with a guy if they abuses them just because they had a “rough start in life”.And the ending whith marriage and children is really cliché…especially for such a book.Open your… Read more »
Sydnie
Guest

I think what is so telling is that it isn’t only Christians who are against this movie. I have read secular articles, including articles on humor websites that are not known for being appropriate, that show why all people should boycott 50 Shades. I also think the terrible press tour and the fact that the main actors don’t even like the movie says something huge.

P
Guest

Countless amounts of money, time and PSA’s are out about Stopping the Abuse, End Domestic Violence.
It will never end when we live in a society that celebrates books or movies such as these.

Just my two cents.

ADW
Guest

For someone who hasn’t read the book, you sure do know A LOT about it.

Mone
Guest

Debra, ! I totally agree with you: its content is really disturbing and twisted!! Thanks for voicing your opinion!

Teo
Guest
Hy Debra,as a teen and a female at the same time,I would like to say that I strongly agree with you.First of all,many teenage girls are infatuated with this book and movie and I find that shocking.This book is clearly about abuse and possibly rape because,Ana is a naive virgin girl and Christian is domineering,deranged,cunning and manipulative man.He begins to take an interest in her and becomes obsessed,not with her,but the ideea of corupting her.At one point in the story they agree there should be a safe word for stopping,Ana uses it but he does not stop,that could be called… Read more »
Ashliegh
Guest
I can understand why so many are against it, especially if they haven’t read it. My issue is – if you haven’t read it, you wouldn’t know the background to it. Christian Grey was molested as a child, and it led him into a life of sub/dom relationships. It’s the only way he knew to connect sexually. Ana changed that, as she knew that love did not involve any of that. In the end, this really is a love story. Loving someone even with their scary flaws and troubled past. They grow as people, and Christian learns what true love… Read more »
Lee Winters III
Guest

I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again – I would gladly give all the remaining years of my life to have one left that I could spend with a wife. I would focus everything I have – everything I am into that one year, and into that one woman’s heart. I am willing to risk much to become something greater than what I can attain alone. Keep your shades of gray…………I want the Light!!!

niyken
Guest

Debra,
You have a powerful gift of communication and you are using it to glorify God. I pray that you will continue encouraging others because this world will need more strong wise women of God like you.

blessing

Louis brown
Guest

My question is besides the moral issue,why are so many women going too see this movie anyway, considering that most critics think it’s just a plain carbage movie with horrible acting . Even the previews are stupid, plus you can see much better sex scene on cable TV shows today. I get the initial
interest because of the book, but most of the people that seen the first weekend say it wasn’t that good.

Sarah Nezar
Guest

I haven’t read the book or seen the movie, nor do I intend to. I have heard these negative things & more & also believe it to be wrong! I don’t understand how people can actually believe that these things are ok! God bless you for sharing this.
Your Sister in Christ,
Sarah

wpDiscuz